Preschool of Spiders
Heh heh. Another Ryodan spiff. I guess I really enjoy Ryodan related humor:
(Hunter x Hunter style, or, perhaps, Ryodan style?)
The teacher: Togashi Yoshihiro
Number of students: 13 (namely, the 13 Ryodan(and they're all 5 yr olds))
Togashi-sensei: Today is the first day of school and I'm your teacher, Togashi-sempai. Spiders: ??? (is this guy crazy or what? Sempai(brother)????)
Togashi-sensei: Let's first get to know each other...So...um...who's going to start...?
Phinks: I will. What do I say first?
Togashi-sensei: Your name---
Togashi-sensei: Your birthday---
Phinks: Hm....hm...your questions are too hard! Give me some easier ones!
Togashi-sensei: Your blood type---
Phinks: I SAID TO GIVE ME SOME EASIER ONES!
Togashi-sensei: What you like to do in your free time---
Phinks: Finally an easy one! I like to twist people's necks around so that they can't---
Togashi-sensei (*sweatdrop*): Um...thank you for starting first Phinks...(thinkingI really can't bear to hear the rest of your gruelsome explanation...) Machi(to Shizuku quietly): Sheeesh! He's just an old man, I expected someone cuter to be the teacher.
Shizuku: Eh? What is 'someone cuter'?
Machi: Uhhhh....someone who looks really cute....
Shizuku: Huh? What's 'someone who looks really cute'?
Machi: *sweatdrop* Just the exact opposite of that guy there *points to Hisoka*
Togashi-sensei (forced smile): Ahem. Listen to me, everyone has to introduce themselves first...(*looks at Hisoka*) Why don't you do it next?
Hisoka (ignores Togashi, speaks to Machi): Oh really?
Machi (annoyed): Get away from me!
Hisoka: Wait a sec. I haven't gotten your name yet. My mom said you have to be polite and tell other people your name when asked.
Machi: Well my mom said to stay away from stalkers like you!
Hisoka: I wasn't stalking you...just asking you to play a card game...
Machi and Shizuku: Eh?
Shalnark: Oh? A card game? I want to play too!
Pakunoda: Same here. (They start the card game. They're playing BS, or Cheat, or Baloney Sandwich, or Bullshit, or whatever you call it.)
Shalnark: I'lll start. A king.
Machi: An ace
Hisoka (*puts down 3 threes): 3 aces
Hisoka(*changes 3 threes to 3 aces using nen*)(*flips over cards*): See? 3 aces!
Pakunoda: (*stares at hand, there is an ace*): You cheated! I have an ace!
Hisoka: (grins) No, there's proof that I put down 3 aces *points to cards* ....game continues like this, with Paku getting more and more annoyed...
Kuroro (busy reading)
Togashi-sensei (shocked): Wow! You can read! But...can you understand?
Kuroro (annoyed *Mutters* Of course I can read, and why would I bother if I couldn't understand?): Yah I can understand. It's about spiders, and it says that the head of the spider is the most important, except in the case of life-death situations, where either the body or the head can be important. Don't you think that's very true?
Togashi-sensei (*thinking*Huh?! What's he talking about? He's only five...and I can't understand while HE CAN..): Uhhh..uhh...riiiiight....uhuh... I need to check up on what Ubogin and Nobunaga are up to...(runs away in embarrassment)
Kuroro (saw through Togashi's act, *mutters*): You idiot...
*following Togashi-sensei to Ubogin and Nobunaga*
Ubogin: *kicks wall* *puches wall* *wall collapses* Yay! Fun!
Togashi-sensei: Stop! You can't do that to the building! You'll kill everyone inside it!!!!
Ubogin and Nobunaga: Eh? So?
Ubogin and Nobunaga: You're ruining our fun. *grabs Togashi* *throws out door*
Togashi-sensei: AHHHHHHHHHHHH! *clunk* OWWWWW!
*following Togashi-sensei to where Paku is*
Pakunoda (to Phinks): You still wet your bed at five years old.
Phinks (embarrased and angry): HEY! Don't talk about that! That's a stupid topic!
Pakunoda (to Feitan) : You stopped wetting the bed at 1 years old.
Feitan (*grins proudly*): Yep.
Pakunoda (to Franklin): You stopped at 3.
Pakunoda (to Bonorenolf): And you stopped at 3 1/2.
Togashi-sensei (walks by): Wow! You're quite smart. You even know things like that! How can you tell?
Pakunoda (puts hands on Togashi)(*shouts*) : AND YOU'RE STILL WETTING THE BED!
Rest of the Ryodan: (suddenly tune in on Paku and Togashi) Togashi-sensei (red with embarrassment and anger): WHAT?! YOU'RE LYING! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!!!!
Pakunoda: Yes I do.
Togashi-sensei: NO YOU DO NOT!!!! YOU'RE LYING!!!! YOU CAN'T KNOW A THING LIKE THAT!
Ryodan: Oh...so he's still wetting the bed...hahahahaha....
Togashi-sensei: *runs away*.
Second day of school: (Sign on door)
This preschool as closed down because the teacher is very sick.
Okay, I didn't write this, but then I got permission to post it up. It was originally written in Chinese, and I translated it, but I omitted/modified some parts since it would be funny in Chinese, but boring in English (there was this really funny pun...about Ubogin and Nobunaga 'drawing', which in the Chinese context was a pun on 'fighting'.)